Recent.

new portfolio site, on progress

thought of the day

Damn it Indonesia! You make me become a cynical person.

random shot

About Dream

I just learn. 

When your dream seems to slip away further from you, a part of you die slowly.

The Moment

Chris Gardner: "This part of my life.... This little part in here....is called Happyness."

If some of you don't know what picture is above, this is the scene towards the end of Pursuit of Happyness film when Chris Garner finally had just been offered a job, walked outside the office, and then clapped his hands together as he walked through a crowd of people, elated about his accomplishment and burst into tears of proud.

That feeling... must be very beautiful.

This is the moment I've waited dan wanted since I saw the film.

I don't know at what moment I'm gonna have that feeling. Perhaps when I got a job I want so bad, or winning an exclusive award, or else. My boyfriend said, he once got that feeling as he walked out the final defense room at university, he specifically described it by comparing to this scene. About a month ago, as I finished my final assignment and walk out from the defense room, I feel nothing. No glorious or proud feeling, just relieved that it was finally over.

I want to have that feeling, but the bigger question is am I ready?

Everytime I get a little offer, I am always scared. And that's why I am wasting this whole months doing nothing because I'm scared to get near that moment. I'm scared the answer might not as I expected so I keep prolonging my dreams by doing nothing.

I know eventually I have to leave my comfort zone and take the leap, it's called growing up. And by that time, I swear to God when that moment finally come to me, I'll say "This part of my life...is happyness"

*** 

P.S.: This film is in my top 3 favourite film of all time. Yes, it is that great.
* Don't mind about the misspelling on happYness word. You should watch the film to understand what it means.

Wondering

I'm just wondering. If in the future, my career path can take another direction, it would be:

1. Bartender

 

2. Create and own 60's style dress shop 

 3. Indie crafter

4. Make-up Artist 

5. Movie trailer maker 

6. Own a cute cupcake store 

7. Kindergarten teacher 

8. Shoe designer 

 

 ***

btw, I just watched Australia Next Top Model cycle 6 opening via youtube and it was soooo GREAT. I haven't watched the full episode of cycle 6, but I already know who the winner was, Amanda. Actually, I voted for Kesley. Eventhough she's not as tall as the others, she is so pretty with her perfectly shaped jaws. Anyway, here is the opening video I talked about. I even use the theme song as my cellphone ringing tone. :)

simple reminder for myself

this post strike me

This is such an eye opener.

My life, my work-life so far, could be described in these sentence:

For the first couple years you make stuff, it's just not that good. It's trying to be good, it has potential, but it's not. 

But your taste, the thing that got you into the game, is still killer. And you taste is why your work disappoints you.

This is so true.

I always feel ashamed and disappointed because of my works. I always feel "No, it's just not good enough", "No, I know I can do better than this, but why can't I?", "No,  this is not good at all, I'm not talented. I took the wrong major. I should QUIT".

It drives me crazy, sometimes.

I know that my works not good, but I don't know how to fix them.

Those 2 sentence explain it all.

Maybe that's because I'm a beginner.

With a lot of practice, my works eventually might be better in the future.

It says to make something every week.

That's actually is my problem!

I have many ideas, but I NEVER make them happen.

I always tell myself I don't have enough time to create them,  I know that's a lie.

I do have the time, it's just I don't have the guts to start.

I'm too afraid.

I'm too afraid it will not be as great as I expected.

Yes, I have a very high expectation of myself, and it always haunting me when I don't fulfill it.

On the other hand, I know without that practice, eventually my sense will become dull.

And I'll blame myself forever.

I just have to fight, now.

Or I'll never make it,

I need to create something, NOW!

one of the best feeling in the world

browsing this while listening to this . 

Always working. =)

____________________________

all photo courtesy from: here

social media for me now

These past few days I rarely check my facebook or twitter account.

And I feel much..much... free. 

Especially, I found this site which so similar to tumblr only almost every post in this site is hilarious! XD

I enjoy browse through tumblr and 9gag now. 

Maybe someday I'll miss facebook and twitter, though.